Me in Place

There’s no need for shots or expensive treatments for plump lips (think Jessica Simpson), here’s my poor girl’s guide to DIY Trout Lips:
You’ll need:

1 child – approximately 2-4 years of age

1 cd player – with cd

1. Turn the cd player off first. Then have child try to get his cd to work. Have child yell for your help.

2. Without thinking, lean over the child, centering your chin right over his head.

3. When cd begins playing, keep that chin in place! Child will jump for joy and crash his head into your chin – making you bite your lip.

At this point, you’ll notice the dramatic change in your lips – one side will be swollen 
plump. Now, for the next part! Ignore the pain you’re feeling and go down and eat dinner. This is tricky, take your time!

1. Sit down to eat dinner. Find the crunchiest, chewiest thing on your plate.

2. Bite down – and favoring the swollen side of your lip – bite the opposite side of your mouth. There you have it! Everyone will be asking where you got your lip implants!

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